day 173

the burden of rage is a gift i’ve been given, from a father too wounded to think of another. though, i have muffled, the anger inside me, i know i have given some of it too. we parents aren’t perfect, we feel all the pain of parents before us and our children…

day 172

as i stand taller in the shoes i have chosen and embrace the self i have become. i walk without knowing where i am going but finally accepting from where i have come. 6.22.17

day 171

the morning is soft, the sun still gentle, forgiving. i sit in a quiet house eagerly devouring the silence like a forbidden fruit. all are asleep, perhaps dreaming, without desire for more. no struggle for my attention, nor needs to fulfill. i simply sip my bitter coffee, guide my pen, and relax….

my girl (day 170)

a smile so sweet it stings your tongue; she looks at you with sapphire eyes hypnotic innocence of the impact her beauty has. as she grows she lengthens tall and lean graceful like a gazelle, with the ferocity of a feral cat whose aggression hides a deeper pain of abandonment. surrounded by…

fathers (day 169)

on a day for fathers, there are none, in my world. no stubble chin, strong arms, baseballs thrown, hugs that lift you off the ground… larger than life, always safe, invincible, but not here. 6.18.17

my son (day 168)

eyes, deep chocolate brown, longing to be seen. lashes so long they sweep his face, my beautiful son. towering tall, always so ready to grow, still a boy, nearing a man; his gentleness masks all he feels. i kiss him good night as long as he lets me… sleep tight. 6.17.17

Summer Potato Hack

In the winter, the oven warming up the house as it bakes potatoes is comforting. In the summer, however, using the oven seems wasteful. But baked potatoes are such a versatile food. They can be eaten as a simple meal for dinner, with a variety of toppings. They have other uses than…

summer cold (day 167)

the damp has stuffed my head, i feel top-heavy and slow. edges are soft, color bleed and i plod on tipsy, averting a stumble. 6.16.17

navigator (day 166)

stay the course i steer my ship to calmer waters, past shallow shores, rocky inlets or choppy seas. steady, i go each turn growing sure of my navigation to my route ahead. 6.15.17

day 165

i dare not revel in the sun with its inconstant beauty fickle in its presence yet still demanding worship like the first flush of love which fades to soft admiration 6.14.17

day 164

the sun, like a fan dancer, hid away again, easing us with hope of dry days, reminding us of forgotten chores, but then, like a phantom, vanished again. 6.13.17

day 163

in your absence you stole her breath, her invincible self, bled. you ran to forget, to hide while i heard her scream for what she could not say 6.12.17

day 162

resplendent, my crimson lip, bitten. hair, sun streaked tomboy. body, strong sore tighten. 6.11.17

day 161

the day was closing like a tired restaurant ready to shut its doors – in came the sun with its brilliant amber glow, dazzling us after days of rain giving hope that all is not lost 6.10.17

day 160

awake, i dream walking around you as i gaze into your eyes opening your heart to see what it may hold, flying above to see where you will go and, if in time, i am beside you 6.9.17

day 159

still, the rain persists, day after day, i fill up with the loneliness of others, their incompleteness threatens to overflow. i carry in the mud of indecision on the soles of my shoes, while the wind moans of their anguish which i’m unable to heal. 6.8.17